


I'd do it all over again for you

by robron_til_the_end



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: M/M, Time Travel, redo, the whole robron story
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-12
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-16 21:54:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 16,233
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28713864
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/robron_til_the_end/pseuds/robron_til_the_end
Summary: Aaron's very depressed at the end of 2020, missing Robert and reminiscing. He wakes up in shock, back in 2014. He slowly realises he has the chance to change things this time around, as he relives the robron story in real time. Will he change anything?  Can he?
Relationships: Aaron Dingle/Robert Sugden
Comments: 343
Kudos: 447





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> I'm only vaguely aware of canon for Aaron in 2020, so largely I'm ignoring that. I'm also not that concerned with getting the dates completely accurate, firstly because it means updates would be slower, double checking things, and secondly, because I'm going to purposefully change some things.  
> (The first chapter is only the set up!)

31st December 2020

Aaron took another deep drink of his pint. He was tired. Not sleepy tired, but weary in his soul, and even though others were looking forward to the new year after the shitty year of 2020, Aaron wasn’t. 2021 didn’t give him any joy, because it’d be another year without Robert. Even though he’d stopped mentioning him all the time, Aaron missed him immensely. There was a limit to how many times Aaron could talk about his imprisoned husband in public without everyone thinking he was crazy or even worse, people feeling sorry for him. But the truth was, Aaron missed him more every day. So, he was doing the typical lonely old man bit of drinking his sorrows away. Admittedly, in the back room of his mums pub, but even so.

God, what he wouldn’t give to go back. Forget the global pandemic, he’d cope with that fine if he just had Robert with him. Actually, lockdown with Robert sounded fun, now that he thought about it. Aaron smiled to himself. Yeah, that could have been entertaining.

“It’s nearly the countdown, love,” Chas said, wondering if Aaron had actually fallen asleep on the sofa. He looked like he was halfway to unconsciousness.

“Yeah, I’ll skip it,” Aaron said, swapping the pint for the whisky bottle and a quick swig. “Here’s to 2021, yeah?”

“Yeah,” Chas said, closing the door and leaving him to it. Aaron drifted off to sleep right when the countdown in London hit “one! Happy new year!”

* * *

November 2014.

Aaron had a massive headache. Had he really drunk that much last night? He rolled over in bed, realising that he wasn’t on the sofa where he thought he was. Instead he was in his old bedroom at his mums, looking just like he remembered. Had he been that out of it that he couldn’t get back to the Mill? Tempting though it was to roll over and go back to sleep, he really should check the yard. He'd been avoiding it since the week before Christmas. A walk up there would do him good, fresh air and all that.

He pulled his jeans and hoodie on, not overthinking it and grabbed his phone. But… it wasn’t his phone. It was a strange weight, and actually, now he thought about it, it was very like his old phone. He left it on the charger where he’d found it. Well, he couldn’t have been that drunk to put a phone on charge, right? Aaron dug around the pockets of his jeans and hoodie but he couldn’t find a mask. “Come on,” he murmured to himself. He really could do with a coffee. But no, no mask at all. _“Fine, I guess I’ll make myself a coffee at the yard.”_ Aaron thought to himself. He snuck out of the pub and made his way up to the yard. He normally drove, but he wasn’t sure he was sober enough and the cold air did him good anyway.

It wasn’t there. Aaron frowned, then started to panic. The yard genuinely... just wasn’t there. It was an empty messy patch of scrubland with nothing in it. “What the fuck?” Aaron said to himself. Was he dreaming? That must be it. Then, something which stopped him dead.

Val, walking Cheryl, her gorgeous black dog. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost!” Val said, clearly teasing, but Aaron felt that he _had_ seen a ghost. That was exactly the emotion he was going through. Val was… dead. Very, very dead. And yet, here she was, standing in front of him like she was real.

“Er, yeah, heavy night,” Aaron said, grappling for something to say. “Where’s the yard?”

“Ey?” Val asked, confused.

“Er… I don’t know, I’m just going to go.” Aaron wandered off, heading back down to the village, but his heart was racing. This wasn’t  _ normal _ . What the hell was happening? Aaron rushed to the village shop, looking at the date on the newspaper. 5th November 2014. Aaron’s breath started to come in fits and starts, and he distantly wondered if this was what a full blown panic attack actually felt like. This was insanity. It couldn’t be 2014. That was literally impossible. Yeah, 2020 was a complete mess, but rewinding six years wasn’t logical. It just… wasn’t.

“Hey, you all right?” David asked, seeing Aaron hyperventilate over the newspaper rack.

“Fine,” Aaron gasped, racing back to the pub. This had to be some weird elaborate joke, right? “Heya love,” Chas said, flicking through her fashion magazines in the back.

“What date is it?”

“What?” Chas said, screwing up her eyes at him.

“Don’t mess around with me,” Aaron said. “It’s a funny joke, ha ha, I get it. Now, tell me what the date is?”

“What are you on?!” Chas snapped. “It’s November. I don’t know the date, it all blurs. Seventh?”

“Not January?” Aaron asked.

“Aaron!” Chas said, looking really annoyed and slightly alarmed.

“Who’s Eve?” Aaron said and Chas looked blankly at him. No way could she fake that. “I’ve gotta go.”

Where did he go? What did he do? Should he try going to sleep and waking back up in 2021? Would that even work? No, of course not. This is crazy. It couldn’t really be happening. What should he do?

Aaron got in his car (wilfully ignoring the fact it looked suspiciously like his 2014 car, not the one he drove now) and went up to Home Farm. There really only was one way to check. He parked at the top of the drive, noticing the gate wedged open and he hid behind the wall and shrubbery at the top. Not that he’d had a lot of practise or anything.

There was a large van at the house, workmen milling around it. Someone was moving out. Or moving in, Aaron guessed. He watched as the removal men unloaded boxes. Then Aaron saw Chrissie White- and Robert. Seeing Robert was like a shot of electricity to the system, adrenaline overloading him. He would always react to Robert’s presence like this, like he was completely magnetised by the man. Tall, blond, and… six years younger. 

Aaron vomited behind the wall.


	2. First Meeting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't thank you enough for all the support for this idea and this fic, which if I manage to complete will be a super long one!! It really means so much to me, and is the only reason I've managed such a quick update in a very hectic week for me privately. That said, enjoy Ross stealing Robert's car.

Going back to the pub, Aaron raced into the bathroom and locked the door. He breathed heavily, trying to pull himself together, and he looked in the mirror, studying himself. God, he didn’t look like he was heading towards thirty, he looked like he was twenty two again. Was this really happening? Was it even possible? He looked in his early twenties, his face was younger. Maybe he should just get blind drunk and wake up in 2021 again. Maybe that would fix it. Actually that wasn’t the worst idea. If this was true (and he doubted it), it started by him getting drunk at 2020’s new years eve party. Or at least, what passed for a “party” in 2020. Would that reverse this... time flip or whatever it was?

Aaron decided that was what he’d do. He nicked a bottle of whisky from the pub, after putting £20 in the till, ignoring the clamour of people that, in the present day, would make people shiver with fear, before going back into the backroom of the pub and drinking himself into unconsciousness, praying it’d work. He ignored Chas, critising him quietly for celebrating new years a month too early, and slipped into an unconscious stupor.

He wasn’t pleased to discover that the result of his binge drinking was a headache, a sore neck for sleeping in the wrong place on the sofa, and a phone that still stubbornly read “2014.” Oh well. It hadn’t worked.

_Are you so eager to get back to 2021?_ A voice inside him said. _Wouldn’t you like to see Robert again?_ Yes, he really really would. But what he truly wanted was happily married Robert with him, not closeted and scared Robert. _Isn’t that better than no Robert at all?_ Yes, probably, Aaron realised. Maybe, just maybe, he should make the most of this… opportunity. He could really enjoy Robert, make up for the time they were losing currently. For all he knew, he could wake up tomorrow back in the “normal” timeline of things, and Robert-less.

He’d no sooner come to the conclusion to try and enjoy Robert again in this timeline, over a bacon sandwich and a mug of tea, when a knock on the pubs backroom came and Ross appeared around the corner. “You said you’d help.”

“Help with what?” Aaron asked. “Oh,” he added as the memory slotted into place. Charity and Ross’s car scheme. Which he was cut in for to save some money for when Adam got out of prison. Adam. He’d see his best mate again, he realised with warmth. “Yeah, fine, I’ll do this one, but then I’m out.” He really didn’t want to push it.

“Aw, getting cold feet?” Ross said in a baby voice.

“Nah, mate I just like being out of prison,” Aaron said. And keeping Robert out of prison too, he added to himself.

“Come on, we’ll be late.”

* * *

Aaron managed to lose himself in the methodical rhythm of stripping a car, while his mind ticked over. The oil was under his nails, the creak of metal in his ears. It was all very, very real, far more than his dreaming imagination could come up with. He really had transported, somehow, back to 2014. After the initial shock, Aaron wasn’t complaining though. He could see Robert again. He could kiss Robert again, and if he didn’t somehow “correct” the timeline, he could maybe, just maybe, get Robert back for good.

“Right, it’s stripped, I want my cut, and I’m out,” Aaron said.

“Oh, come on, just one more,” Ross said.

“No, this was my one more, I’m done. Find yourself another grease monkey.” Aaron shivered as he said that word, an inadvertent reminder of Robert. Was it tomorrow? The days blurred a bit and Aaron couldn’t remember exactly when Ross had stolen Robert’s car. Tomorrow, right? He wasn’t sure enough.

But when, two days later, Ross text Aaron asking for help up at the farm, Aaron leapt into action quicker than he should have done, not even asking for directions to which barn. He knew where it’d be.

Sure enough, he found Ross with Robert’s car, all perfectly white and arrogant. Truth was, Aaron had always hated this car.

“And for my next trick!” Ross said, smug as he pulled the cover off.

“What about the tracking device?” Aaron said.

“Disabled,” Ross said.

“Idiot!” Aaron said, even though his heart was racing and arguing with him saying _no, it’s a really good idea Ross. The best idea you ever had._

The door burst open. “Never rely on the manufacturer's tracker.” It wasn’t shock that had Aaron freezing, it was the deep familiarity with that gorgeous voice. He’d been expecting Robert to walk in, but to actually see him this close? It made Aaron stop breathing.

“Just found it parked here, mate. It’s nothing to do with us,” Aaron said after an embarrassingly long pause as Aaron willed his body not to react to Robert’s proximity. He couldn’t go too far off script here, he knew how this went. Almost too well. He'd relived this moment so many times over the years.

“Cain’s handiwork then? I wonder if Moira knows? I’ll check,” Robert said, looking at Aaron directly with those blue eyes. The shed was too dingy to really see his eyes properly in this light, but Aaron knew. He could feel it.

“No point upsetting her, is there?” Aaron said. He couldn’t care less about Moira right now. “I’m sure we can work something out.”

“I don’t negotiate with idiots.”

“Really, that’s all right then, negotiate with me,” Aaron said, staring at Robert. 

“Really?” Robert said. “I reckon I’ll do what the hell I like, because I pretty much own you both now.”

Aaron laughed. He didn’t mean to, but Robert just wasn’t as threatening as he liked to believe. And if Aaron hadn’t been so attracted to him back then, he’d have never let Robert get away with it in the first place. “It’s funny is it?” Robert said. “I bet the police won’t be laughing.”

“If you were going to call them, you’d have called them by now,” Aaron said. “There’s a reason you didn’t report your car stolen.”

“Easy,” Ross said, clearly trying to keep the peace. “There must be something we could do. Think about it, we could be useful to you.”

“Oh yeah, how?” Robert said, humouring him.

“You need something or someone taken care of?” Ross said. “You come to us.”

“Oh right, and I can trust a couple of idiots like the two of you, can I?” Robert said. Aaron frowned. This wasn’t exactly what Robert said last time. He’d just agreed. He wasn’t supposed to say something else.

“Of course you can!” Ross wheedled. “We get stuff done. Don’t we Aaron?”

“Whatever he says,” Aaron grumbled. Ross threw Robert his keys back and quickly left the shed, leaving Aaron and Robert alone. No, this hadn’t happened the first time. This was new. Brand new.

“You’re not as talkative as him, are you?” Robert said.

“This," Aaron gestured to the car. "...had nothing to do with me,” Aaron said.

“You’re not a car thief, then?” Robert carried on.

“Formerly,” Aaron said. “I’m not stupid enough to steal a car off my own doorstep."

“Your mate clearly is,” Robert said. “I’ll take him up on the offer.” Robert almost winked. “Once I think of something.” Then he left, leaving Aaron alone, with a racing heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am going to copy bits of the script, but I'm hoping to make enough changes that it won't stay word for word. But their first meeting felt to iconic to completely re write, so I kept the majority of it as it aired. But it won't be like that for a lot of future scenes (other than the epic ones!)
> 
> Hope you have the time to leave a comment, thanks again!


	3. The Burglary

Aaron waited for a call, to arrange the fake robbery on Home Farm. Last time around, Robert hadn’t called him, he’d called Ross instead. Aaron had been very reluctant last time, because it crossed a line for him. Cars were fair game, but stealing from someone’s house really felt like crossing some invisible line for him. This time he didn’t have a second thought about morality, instead his whole body was vibrating with “ _Robert_.” and “ _I need to see him again._ ”

Something that was niggling at Aaron though. Robert hadn’t stuck to the script word for word. Had he reacted to Aaron’s behaviour? Laughing, instead of taking Robert’s threats seriously? Could Aaron change things? How much could he change things? If he did one wrong step now, would he and Robert never end up getting together, let alone married and happy? Because while there were things he would want to change, that wasn’t one of them. He needed to be with Robert in the end. He just had to be.

Maybe their love story wasn’t as epic as he thought it was, if a different move from him could change the conversation between them both. _You’re looking into this far too much_ , Aaron told himself. _It was a couple of extra sentences, it doesn’t mean anything._ Aaron held onto that thought as he rolled over in bed. His phone buzzed with a text from Ross.

“Robert’s calling in his favour tomorrow.” 

* * *

“I’m not doing it,” Aaron said, though it was really a token gesture. There was no way he wasn’t going to end up at Home Farm, not now he knew what came from it.

“You are,” Ross said.

“Robert’s not going to call the police,” Aaron said, completely sure. “And even if he did, what’s he going to say? We stole his car that’s sitting on his driveway?”

“No, but the police might be interested in our little side project,” Ross said. Aaron shrugged because he really didn’t care.

“Just tell me when, okay?” Aaron said. “Then we can be done with the whole thing.”

“Delightful,” Ross said sarcastically.

“Oh, and by the way, I’m out of the car stuff,” Aaron said. “I mean it, I can’t risk it.” He couldn’t, but not for the reason Ross would assume. He didn’t want one thing to have a knock on effect and change everything with him and Robert.

Ross’s phone beeped. “Coast clear.” 

“Shall we?” Ross said with his false bravado that had always wound Aaron up.

“Lets get it over with,” Aaron grumbled.

* * *

The journey up to Home Farm wasn’t exactly a comfortable one, and Aaron really should have asked where Ross got those burglary ski masks from. But before they knew it, they were in Home Farm, and Lawrence appeared out of nowhere. Oh yeah, Aaron never did give Robert grief for saying the house was empty when it had people crawling all over it. Maybe this time.

Ross hit Lawrence over the head, and they both carried him outside to one of the outbuildings when Robert appeared, laughing at them.

“Have you sorted the CCTV out?” Aaron asked.

“No, I thought I’d leave that on until after I was caught talking to you two,” Robert said. Aaron rolled his eyes and lifted the mask, still getting annoyed with Robert even though he knew how it went. “Right, take whatever you want from downstairs and his room. Not much from ours, but make sure you get something or it’s going to look suss.” Aaron shouldn’t have felt the stab of unwarranted jealousy when Robert said “ours” meaning his and Chrissie’s, but he did. _You’re with the wrong person_ , Aaron wanted to scream. _It’s me, not this rich woman you’re only with for money!_ Robert took Aaron’s hesitation, while thinking things through as reluctance to steal.

“Do you not like free stuff if it’s not on four wheels?” Robert pushed, once Ross had gone off in search of valuables.

“Are you actually that desperate to impress them that you’ve got to pay people to let you hit them?” Aaron said, scowling at Robert. 

“No, the hitting’s the least of it. You deserve that for my car alone.” Aaron huffed. Yeah, you’ve got to break through that facade all over again, Aaron reminded himself. “Actually, you really want to know?”

“No,” Aaron said.

“I’m going to tell you anyway, because I’m not having you, a thief, judge me,” Robert said. “I’ve earned his respect, but he doesn’t give it out. He always has to have you dancing to his tune. Like when I was visiting my dead mum, and he’s there faking a heart attack.” Aaron knew that was true, and that was a fair point. That really was pushing things too far from Lawrence. “He’s due a bad day.” Then the mask came back. “I’ll also enjoy smacking you in the face.”

“Enjoy it. You won’t get another free one, trust me.” Aaron walked away, enjoying knowing Robert’s eyes were on his back as he left. Hopefully his arse too.

* * *

The burglary went just as it should have done. Chrissie walking in, things going bad, Lawrence having a genuine heart attack, which Aaron should probably have cared more about than he did. One thing was different though. Aaron didn’t punch Robert in the face. In the moment, he’d forgotten that he’d done it originally, and by the time he’d remembered, it was too late. Which did leave Robert with an unbruised face this time.

Afterwards, Robert confronted Aaron in the pub loos. “That went well,” Robert said sarcastically.

“Don’t start blaming me, this was all your idea,” Aaron said, narked off.

“Lawrence having a heart attack and stealing Chrissie’s jewellery was not part of my plan,” Robert said.

“It’s not my problem,” Aaron said. “You should have thought about that before you tried making deals with a lunatic like Ross.”

“Not a lunatic like you, then?” Robert countered.

“I wasn’t the one breaking vases and stealing jewellery or hitting your… family” he almost spat the word. "...unconscious.”

“Get me Chrissie’s ring back. Her mum died a few years ago, it was hers,” Robert said.

“Ross’s got it, not me,” Aaron said. “Talk to him.”

“How about I call the police about your chop shop?”

“How about I tell Lawrence who arranged the burglary?” Aaron said. “You’re in this just as much as we are now.” Was it wrong to think Robert actually looked more attractive with a bruised face? Probably. _Lets not examine what specific Robert related kinks you have right at this moment_ , Aaron told himself. “We’re done here.”

* * *

Aaron found the ring and dropped it on Robert’s table in the pub. “That’s yours, right?”

“Not mine exactly, but I’ll make sure it gets back to its rightful owner,” Robert said. Aaron nodded. “Let me buy you a pint,” he said sincerely. Aaron desperately wanted to agree, but Chas was behind the bar. 

“Maybe another time,” Aaron said, flicking his eyes to the bar. Robert cottoned on quick.

“Okay,” Robert said. “Thanks.”

* * *

“Do you fancy him or something?” Aaron froze. He’d forgotten Ross had ever said that about him and Robert, back when he was pissed off that Aaron had given the ring back to Robert. Yeah, Ross, on this one occasion, might have had a point.

* * *

The tension in Aaron was bubbling over. He was so focused on not screwing up the timeline, on keeping things the same, the added pressure of the burglary, the way his heart flipped whenever he saw Robert, because it’d been so long since he’d really seen him, that Aaron flipped.

“Buy a pint on me,” Robert said, holding out a ten pound note. Aaron whipped around and threw Robert against the wall.

“You can stick your money, who d’you think you are?!” Aaron’s fists were curled up in Robert’s jacket, really touching him for the first time.

“Alright, mate!” Robert said. “I’m only trying to say thanks.”

“I don’t want your thanks, and I don’t want to be your mate,” Aaron snapped. He didn’t, he wanted so much more than “mates.” “Don’t be calling on me to do any more of your dirty work, because me and you are quits, right. We’re done. And if I see you lording it about one more time I’m going to wipe that smug smile right off your stupid face!”

“You haven’t got the balls to hit me,” Robert said.

Aaron don’t know what happened to him, but he punched Robert, exactly where he should have done during the burglary. It was almost as if he couldn’t control it, and he was completely shaken by this, Robert gasping with the shock of it as Aaron walked away, panicking. 

Maybe he had no power to change anything at all. Maybe he was here just for the ride. If that was the case? He was going to enjoy it.


	4. First Kiss

“Why’re you giving Chrissie freebies at the garage?” Robert said, sidling in to the pub. “Are you trying to get caught? She thought it was weird.” Right, replacing the brake pads. Yeah, Aaron remembered.

“Someone being nice to her is weird? No surprises there, with your family,” Aaron said darkly.

“You fancy her or something?” Robert teased, keeping on pushing and Aaron laughed.

“Er, no.”

“Is that what you do for tips around the back of the garage? Dirty little grease monkey.” Aaron fought the shiver of recognition, the first time Robert had called him that.

“I don’t fancy her, mate.”

“It’s all right, it’s allowed, I’m not going to deck you.”

“I’ll remember that for when I stop being gay, eh?” Aaron drained his pint and knew Robert was watching him as he left, and he thoroughly enjoyed it.

* * *

The next few days were occupied with Ross and Charity’s car scheme being uncovered, and Aaron wasn’t really paying that much attention. However, he did guess that this ruled out the possibility that it was some highly coloured Robert related dream, because if it was, he wouldn’t bother wasting time with Charity’s car plans. Also, this had been going on too long. He was still doing the boring shit that came with life, working at the garage, trying to keep his mum from nosing into his business, wasting days while he waited for the high points with his relationship with Robert. Yeah, this was certainly not a dream.

* * *

Aaron got that unpleasant sinking feeling as he saw Chrissie walk up to the garage. Robert’s “wedding present” of a car that he sorted, he realised as she started speaking. Definitely should have charged Chrissie more for that one. Yeah, he’d do that this time. Because he could, not because he was jealous that Robert was waking up next to her instead of him in this time line. Of course not.

Then Robert appeared, and Aaron’s stomach flipped. Would he ever get used to seeing Robert again like this? Probably not.

“What was all that about?” Robert asked once Chrissie had left, guilt written all over his face.

“None of your business,” Aaron said, bending over the car he’d been working on before Chrissie came to see him.

“Cut the crap,” Robert said. “Have you been blabbing?”

“Now what could I have to tell Chrissie?” Aaron asked. “That you pay people to frighten the life out of her and steal from her house?”

“Aaron!” Robert hissed, eyes looking both ways, like he was terrified someone would overhear them.

“Oh, come off it,” Aaron said. “If I had told her the truth, do you think I’m convincing enough to get her to stop calling the police on me? Or both of us?”

“Probably not,” Robert admitted, calming down. “So what was it about?”

“She’s after a car,” Aaron said. “That’s all, nothing terrible. You can unclench that scheming brain of yours.” Robert frowned at him. _Too familiar, Aaron,_ he said to himself. He knew Robert so well, he knew that’s what Robert would be thinking, but Robert was completely unaware of that connection, and that was too close to home. 

Robert left, but was back in ten minutes with two take away coffee cups in his hand. “Punters pay you extra to rough their cars up?” he asked after Aaron was a bit aggressive with a car.

“No, just their fiance’s,” Aaron quipped.

“Suppose I deserved that,” Robert said.

“What do you want, I’m busy,” Aaron said quickly.

“To say thanks,” Robert said. “For getting Chrissie’s ring back. You didn’t have to, and I appreciate it.” Aaron shrugged. “Can we start over?” Robert asked.

“Why?” 

“Because I’d like us to get on,” Robert said.

“Why?” Aaron asked again. Robert shrugged, not saying anything else. He put a cup of coffee down on the side and Aaron smiled at it, taking a sip.

“Next time, add one sugar.”

“I’ll remember that,” Robert said, smiling at him. That smile really was a killer. “Bye.”

* * *

Aaron woke up, checking the date on his phone. 4th December 2014. It was _today_. It’d happen today. Aaron tried to roll over and doze, sleep the day away, but he couldn’t. He was restless, waiting for the text. What if it didn’t come? What if Robert never faked his breakdown? It’d change everything. But the first move had to come from him, Aaron just had to wait.

_Broken down on the skipdale road. Call out?_ Aaron smiled to himself.

“What’s got you so happy?” Chas asked from across the bar.

“None of your business,” Aaron said easily, before leaving and grabbing the keys to the truck from outside the garage.

* * *

Aaron pulled up in front of Robert’s car, and he took a deep breath before getting out. This was it. It had just hit him. He was going to see Robert, he was going to relive their moment, in their layby, all over again. Back when it didn't have meaning or memory. God, he wanted to touch and taste Robert so badly that it hurt. He'd guessed what Robert wanted at the time anyway, but this time... it had been more than a year since he'd touched Robert intimately and his hands were shaking slightly with it.

"What's wrong with it?"

"Don't know," Robert said. "The engine just cut out on me."

“Keys?”

“In the car,” Robert said. Aaron reached for them, turned them and the car sparked to life. Robert had been a mechanic in a former life, could he not have disconnected a connection in the engine to at least make it look convincing?

“It’s fine,” Aaron said blankly.

“Not ten minutes ago it wasn’t,” Robert said.

“Pop open the boot, then.” Robert did. “Why didn’t you call a garage?”

“I did,” Robert said. “I just cut out the middleman by asking you.”

After about five minutes, Aaron couldn’t keep up with the charade. “There’s nothing wrong with it.”

“Right,” Robert said. Aaron waited, but Robert wasn’t forthcoming.

“I’m done here,” Aaron said, heading back to the truck, waiting, waiting for Robert to move, to do... _something_.

“Wait, there’s nothing wrong with the car, I made it up.” 

“Why?” Aaron asked. “You like wasting my time?”

“What do you think?”

“I think I don’t like being messed around,” Aaron said, turning to go.

“Don’t!” Robert said. “You… Because you know why we’re both still here.” Robert got close, invading Aaron’s personal space, but then stopped, like there was some wall there. He was too nervous to really go for it. “Forget it.”

“Fine,” Aaron said, walking away. _Pull me back_ , Aaron’s body screamed. _Don’t let me leave!_ The hand on Aaron’s shoulder took him almost by surprise, even though he’d been waiting for it, Robert pulling him around and then kissing him. The touch of lips was so stunning that Aaron froze for a split second. Robert pulled back, eyes closed, like he could finally breathe again, before going back in for more. This time Aaron gave as good as he got, the kiss going on and on. Aaron ran his thumb along Robert’s jawline as Robert assaulted his senses. It had been so long since Aaron had tasted him, the sensation was intoxicating. Aaron’s hands pushed under Robert’s leather jacket, peeling the layers off, his hands sliding down Robert’s arms, feeling the muscles under his shirt. 

Aaron opened the door to the truck, pushing Robert in. Robert guided Aaron’s hand to his belt and Aaron was surprised, but he didn’t argue, fumbling with the buckle. He felt so good, tasted better, then…

“No,” Robert said, pulling away. “This was a mistake.” And it hurt.

“This isn’t your first time is it?” Aaron said, as Robert walked away to his car. “It’s obvious you like men.”

“I’m engaged,” Robert said.

“That’s not what I asked,” Aaron said. “Robert, please don’t go.” Robert grabbed him and threw him against the car, Aaron looking up at Robert’s delicious mouth.

“I’ve got to go.” Aaron let him drive off, heart thumping painfully in his chest. That had been better than he remembered, Aaron thought to himself as Robert disappeared down the road. His mouth was still tingling from that. Jesus, was this really happening? Reliving his entire relationship with Robert? Because he'd sped off to be with Chrissie and even now, with all the knowledge of the next five years, that hurt. God, Aaron realised. He'd have to put up with being the affair again, the secret lover. But then... In real life, in 2020 he hadn't touched Robert for more than a year. This, while weird, was somewhat of an improvement. _You sleep with him tonight_ , a voice said in Aaron's head and he grinned to himself. Worth it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From here, I'll be sticking a little less rigidly to the script. My deviations don't necessarily "mean" anything for the timeline of events, but I feel like just copying the script from their original story once the affair is going isn't necessary. Thank you for the feedback so far, I hope you enjoyed this one!


	5. The Garage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we go, earning that rating now! Thanks for all the lovely comments guys!!

That night Cain sent Aaron to the garage for a customer to pick up his car and Aaron agreed without compliant. Cain was drinking in the pub so he was unlikely to check up on him at all. After the customer had disappeared, Robert appeared from the shadows. “I’m busy,” Aaron said briefly.

"I'll be quick," Robert said, following him inside, but Robert didn't say anything else at all, just waiting.

“You’re really starting to annoy me now,” Aaron snapped. “Do you want me or not? Make up your mind, Robert.”

“Oh, I know what I want,” Robert said, closing the gap between them. Aaron almost smiled as Robert kissed him, deep and intense, Robert pushing him quickly into the back of a car, and Aaron wasn’t complaining. In fact his entire body was screaming _yes, more of this, yes!_ Aaron stripped Robert’s shirt off very quickly, hands stroking skin, Aaron pinned on top of Robert. He loved getting to touch Robert like this, but there was no denying the back of the car was really cramped. But then Robert started tugging at Aaron’s jeans impatiently and Aaron decided he didn’t care about the lack of space. Aaron moved down, kissing Robert’s neck, sucking on his pulse point that always made Robert keen desperately, and this time was no exception. The noise he made was exquisite.

“Don’t mark me,” Robert whispered, and Aaron didn’t like the reminder, but he’d play ball, kissing along Robert’s collarbone as Robert had got Aaron’s underwear around his thighs, and started stroking his cock. Aaron couldn’t ever remember being this hard and this desperate for Robert to touch him, because my God, this was intense. Quick, frantic, urgent, intense. Robert sucked his thumb for a second before running it over the head of Aaron’s cock and he gasped.

“Rob, I’m close,” Aaron gasped into his ear, writhing with the pleasure. “God…” Robert kissed Aaron’s neck, wanting to hear him moan as he came, thighs pumping as he rode his orgasm.

“You came quickly," Robert said quietly. Aaron had, he’d come embarrassingly quickly. But it was his first time with Robert, _his_ Robert, in nearly 18 months, so sod him.

“I’ll make it up to you,” Aaron said, shuffling forward and pushing Robert flat on his back. “I’m good for it.” Robert twisted his fingers in Aaron’s hair, that smirk on his face. Aaron pressed open Robert’s thighs and went down on him quickly, mouth stretched around him. Robert gasped, then groaned. Aaron did have an advantage here, he’d already learned exactly how Robert liked to be touched, but fuck it, he was going to give Robert what he wanted.

“Jesus, you’re good,” Robert gasped, thighs tensing with pleasure. Aaron reached behind him, before pausing. Normally he’d push a finger or two in, Robert really enjoyed that, but this was nervous, closeted Robert. Not open, happily married Robert.

“Can I…?” Aaron asked, tapping his index finger against Robert’s hole. Robert stiffened but bravado and fake confidence won out.

“Yeah.” Aaron licked his own fingers before pushing one inside Robert. Robert tensed up and not in the good way. “Relax, this’ll feel good,” Aaron said with confidence before sinking down onto his cock again. It only took a few seconds for Aaron to hit his prostate, Robert making a strangled “oh!” noise. Aaron smiled. Yeah, they still had it. Aaron brushed against his sweet spot as he fluttered his throat around the head of Robert’s cock. Robert groaned, coming with a shout and tight fingers in Aaron’s hair.

Aaron swallowed, then licked his fingers, making sure Robert could see. It was positively filthy and made Robert shiver, like the earth had moved. In some ways, maybe it had.

* * *

They were quiet when they got dressed, Aaron feeling sticky and sensitive underneath his jeans. “You all right?” Aaron asked as Robert put his jacket on.

“Yeah,” Robert said, but he couldn’t look at him.

“Look, I’m not going to screw up your life,” Aaron said. Truer than Robert knew. “I’m not going running to Chrissie, so don’t panic.”

“Okay,” Robert said. “Thanks.”

“Does she know?” Aaron asked. “That you’re bisexual?”

“I’m straight,” Robert said.

“Yeah, straight men always enjoy getting blown by me,” Aaron said. Robert snapped, turning around with his hands in Aaron’s hoodie and pushing him up against the wall.

“This was once,” Robert said. “Keep your mouth shut!” And Robert’s mouth looked so good that Aaron couldn’t resist kissing him again. As it turned out, Robert couldn’t resist either.

* * *

Aaron didn’t linger in the pub afterwards, he had no desire to see Robert all over Chrissie, his act of being 100% straight. Instead he grabbed a bottle of lager and went upstairs to his bedroom. That had felt incredible and he’d enjoyed every second of it. Perhaps even more than last time, because now he could appreciate how special it was between them and how much more it meant.

He got his phone out of his pocket and debated over a text to Robert. It had to be ambiguous enough, just on the low chance Chrissie read it. So he thought about it for several minutes. _“Interesting evening. Take two?”_

Robert replied in about two minutes. _“It’s a one off.”_

Right. Of course it was.

* * *

Aaron had almost got used to the uncomfortable shiver up his spine when he saw people wandering around the village. James, Val, Chrissie to some extent, Andy, Alicia. But the person he wasn’t prepared for, he bumped into outside the cafe. Katie. He felt cold all over and he stopped walking, staring at her. “What’s wrong with you?” Katie asked, taking a sip from her take away coffee cup.

“I er…” Aaron swallowed uncomfortably. “Nothing, I’m… fine.” Katie frowned at him but wandered off anyway, leaving Aaron frozen. Katie. Something he could change, maybe something he should try and change. He’d always felt guilt over her. Maybe she was the reason he’d… jumped through time in the first place, for a lack of a better way to explain it. He turned and looked at her blonde hair, disappearing in the distance. Yeah, he wasn’t going to make the same mistake this time.

* * *

Oh, a squirming Robert. Aaron had almost forgotten about that and how bad he was at it. He’d gone up to Home Farm for Chrissie to pay for the car she’d bought as a surprise for Robert, and Robert had guilt written all over his face. “Where do you think you’re going?”

“Getting the money,” Aaron said.

“How much?” Robert said darkly. It hurt, the assumption that Aaron would blackmail him over sex. How much? How about a lifetime together? How did that sound as a fair payment?

“You’ve got no idea about me, have you?” Aaron said. “I don’t want to be here, any more than you want me here. She’s going to give me the check for the car, then I’m gone. And if you dare accuse me of trying to blackmail you over… us… again, you’re not going to know what hit you.”

“Aaron…” Robert grabbed his arm to stop him from leaving, following Chrissie. "Don’t…” he looked like he had no idea what he was going to say.

“I’m not that kind of bloke,” Aaron said. "You know me better than that."


	6. Upstairs. Now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay in updating this, life's been hectic!! Also I apologise for any typos, I'm using a new keyboard. That said, enjoy!

Aaron really couldn’t be arsed to set up the fake date with Finn to make Robert jealous. It wasn’t worth the effort, especially now he knew how he and Robert ended up. However when Aaron turned up at the pub that night, Finn surprisingly asked him if he wanted a drink. Aaron could feel Robert staring daggers into his back, so Aaron agreed. Just for the expression on Robert’s face, all the while wondering if he really couldn’t change anything. 

Robert approached him in the loos, not really to Aaron’s surprise.

“You trying to make me jealous?” Robert said, his voice changing to that soft, almost dangerous low quality.

“Why would I do that?” Aaron said. “It’s a one time thing, remember?”

“Don’t go with Finn again,” Robert warned.

“You’re telling me who I can and can’t see, all while you’re going home to Chrissie, have I got that straight?” Aaron said in disbelief. “You really are something else.”

“Just don’t…” Aaron waited as Robert tailed off into silence.

“Don’t what, Robert?” Aaron smirked. “Live my life without you? Maybe, just maybe I won’t wait for you to make up your mind.” Aaron was angry. It didn’t seem to matter how well he knew what happened, Robert could still make him as angry as he always had.

* * *

Aaron left the pub and Robert’s car was just sitting there, almost like it was tempting him. For old times sake, he broke the wing mirrors off the car. He now knew Robert wasn’t trying to buy him, or pay him to keep his mouth shut, but that didn’t lessen his anger at the moment.

He returned to the pub to have the brief “some kids gave your car a hell of a kick in,” conversation before heading to the back room and waiting. Robert would appear any moment, he knew it.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?!” Robert hissed at him.

“You like throwing your money around so much, throw it around on your car,” Aaron said. Robert frowned. “You can’t buy me, Robert. I’m not for sale. If you want a no strings attached one night stand, don’t sleep with someone on your doorstep next time.”

“I thought you were trying to blackmail me!”

“I’ve got no interest in that,” Aaron said. “I’m insulted that you think that of me.”

Robert grabbed Aaron’s hoodie and thrust him against the wall. “You touch my car again…”

“And what?” Robert kissed him, maybe to shut him up, but after a couple of seconds, Aaron didn’t care. It felt amazing. When they parted, Robert kept staring at Aaron’s mouth, like he couldn’t think of anything else. “Upstairs. Now.”

“Second on the right,” Aaron said, smiling at him as Robert hared up the stairs. As soon as the door closed, Robert kissed Aaron, pressing him against the door, his right hand pushing under Aaron’s hoodie, trying to feel his skin. “I want you,” Aaron said. “I want you inside me.” Robert paused, looking at him. “Is that okay?”

“Yeah, that’s good,” Robert said, his lips tilting into a slight smile. When he was shirtless, Robert saw his scars and hesitated. The car in the back of the garage had really been too dark to see properly, so this was a surprise to Robert.

“Don’t make it a thing,” Aaron said. “I’m fine.” Robert nodded, instead his hands going to Aaron’s jeans to focus on more important things. As soon as Aaron had Robert shirtless, he pushed him flat on the bed and started kissing down his chest. Robert gripped his hair rather tightly, but Aaron didn’t mind, particularly when a strangled “a...Aaron…” came out in a sigh. It was a familiar map to Aaron, kissing along Robert’s many freckles, some so small they were hard to see but Aaron knew exactly where they were.

“Lube?” Robert asked.

“Drawer,” Aaron said quickly. It was a fumbling rush, getting each other naked while kissing each other as much as possible. Eventually Aaron rolled on his side, spreading his thighs a bit, Robert’s hand curving on his arse. “Come on.” 

Robert lubed his fingers up, then pushed one inside Aaron, Aaron moaning into Robert’s shoulder. “Okay?”

“Good,” Aaron gasped. It had been a long time for him and he was a bit too tight. “Just take it slow.” Robert kissed the top of Aaron’s hair, a move that was oddly sweet as he started pushing his fingers, trying to find Aaron’s prostate. “There,” Aaron gasped, writhing as Robert hit his sweet spot. “God, yes!”

“I like to know what you like,” Robert said, kissing him again while scissoring his fingers, making Aaron pant. Aaron grabbed the condom, making sure to give Robert a few strokes as he put it on him. Robert grabbed him by the waist, fumbling a little in his eagerness and slowly pushed in. Aaron whimpered, because the rush was instantly so familiar.

“Slow,” Aaron said. “As slow as you can.” Happily married Aaron really enjoyed the position when they were spooning together, because they could both last longer like that, and it was more intimate. New affair Aaron really enjoyed being on his hands and knees and really feeling Robert behind him. It was a position that felt amazing, quick and dirty and delicious.

Aaron couldn’t breathe, this felt so good. Robert’s fingers bruising his hips as he thrust inside him. God, how had he managed for a year without feeling this? Robert’s movements stuttered as he groaned loudly, coming inside Aaron. He collapsed half on top of Aaron, kissing his shoulder, whatever sweaty salty skin he could reach as he stroked Aaron off. He was incredibly oversensitive and felt amazing. Robert always had given as good as he got. Robert lazily cleaned them up before closing his eyes. “I enjoyed that,” he murmured and Aaron had to agree.

* * *

“Where’re you going?” Aaron said, slurring as he felt the mattress dip under Robert’s weight. He was more than half asleep.

“Home,” Robert said.

“The Mill?”

“What?” Aaron became awake very, very quickly now.

“Sorry, I think I was dozing,” Aaron said. “Dreaming.”

“Sorry I have to leave,” Robert said. “This was fun.”

“That’s one way of putting it,” Aaron said as Robert put his jacket on. “Wait. Before you go.” Aaron grabbed Robert’s shirt and pulled him close for one more kiss, just because he could.

“There’ll be a next time?” Robert said tentatively.

“Yeah, there will be,” Aaron said. “Bye.”

* * *

Robert couldn’t think of anything other than Aaron. He knew he should be focusing on work, or Chrissie, but he couldn’t. Aaron had got under his skin in a way he couldn’t explain. He’d cheated on Chrissie before with one night stands, but he’d always told himself it was just a quick release. But this, this felt different and Robert couldn’t explain why. Things with Aaron just felt… easy. Aaron himself wasn’t easy. He was angry, fiery, passionate, borderline criminal, but one thing he was, he was honest. With himself, with his feelings, and Robert? He was a pathological liar, he knew that about himself. But the attraction was there, and my God, when they were together it exploded.

“I’ve just got to go into the village and give this to Aaron.” Robert whipped around, like thinking of him had caused Chrissie to say his name. “To pay for the car.”

“I’ll drop it off,” Robert said. “I have to go to the pub anyway. Vic wants a chat, so…”

“Are you sure?” Chrissie asked.

“I promise not to look at how much he charged you,” Robert said. “I could do with the fresh air too.”

“All right,” she said. “Thanks.”

* * *

Aaron was drinking a mug of tea when Robert walked in, waving a check. “Why are you giving her mates rates?”

“Hello to you too,” Aaron said. “I charged her what it was worth, don’t panic.”

“I can’t do this,” Robert said. “I can’t have you and Chrissie talking, I’ll lose my mind.”

“If I was going to tell her, I’d have done it by now,” Aaron said. 

“I can’t have you having any contact with her,” Robert said. “I mean it, or this… it’s not going to happen.”

“You can walk away now can you?” Aaron asked. “After last night?” Robert flushed. “I’m not your first guy, I know that much.”

“Leave it, Aaron,” Robert said briefly. “Do you want to carry on or not?”

“Yeah, I do,” Aaron said. “But I’m not going to promise to toe the line and avoid your Mrs. I won’t go looking for her, but I’m not about to duck out of her way. Fair?”

“Fine,” Robert said. “It has to be this way if we’re going to see each other again.”

“I’ll remember that,” Aaron said. “Thanks for the money.” His voice was dripping with sarcasm.


	7. Adam

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m skipping all the Chrissie recognises Ross / burglary stuff because I really don’t care about it. So, heading towards Christmas, Adam being released and Katie and Andy's wedding rings.

Aaron was driving when he saw Robert walking on the side of the road. Aaron knew in his past life he’d taken Robert to a gay bar to try and prove a point. Well, this time, he didn’t want to push, he didn’t need to. Robert would come out in his own time, and he didn’t fancy the argument right now. He just couldn’t stomach it, particularly when what he really wanted was to fast forward time until he got to the point that he could just cuddle up with Robert on the sofa. “Want to go somewhere?”

“Yeah,” Robert said. “Anywhere but here.”

“Great,” Aaron said, putting his foot down and driving off. “How long’ve you got?”

“Why?”

“I’m wondering if we’ve got time to book a hotel,” Aaron said.

“You’re keen,” Robert said. “No. Just tonight. Not tomorrow.”

“Shame,” Aaron said, even though he wasn’t surprised. “What’s got you so pissed off?”

“Andy,” Robert said. “He’s having my father’s wedding ring melted down to make two for him and Katie. Like it doesn’t mean anything the way it is.”

“Right…” Aaron said. “That’s a problem?”

“I knew you wouldn’t understand.”

“Try me,” Aaron said.

“Yeah, it’s a problem. Why does Andy get the ring? Vic’s got our mums ring, why does Andy always get everything?”

“Seriously, were you going to use it for yours and Chrissie’s wedding?” Aaron was proud of himself for only hesitating for a split second before saying Chrissie’s name.

“That’s not the point!” Robert said. “Knowing it’s being melted down… I know Andy’s the golden boy, even after he burnt my mother to death, and yet he still gets everything?”

“I know,” Aaron said. “I’m sorry. Can I give you some friendly advice?”

“What?”

“Don’t do anything you might regret,” Aaron said.

“Like what?”

“Calling up the jewellers and asking them to engrave “village idiot” into Andy’s wedding ring for example,” Aaron said.

“Good idea,” Robert said.

“I’m serious,” Aaron said. “It could have knock on effects that you can’t even see right now. It’s a bad idea.”

“Why?” Robert pushed.

_Because I can see into the future and you winding up Katie at her wedding directly leads to her being convinced you’re having an affair, which leads to her in Wylies on the morning of your wedding and I’d like to avoid that if I can_. Of course Aaron didn’t say that.

“Robert, leave it,” Aaron said. “Do you trust me?”

“Strangely I do,” Robert said.

"Then don't." Robert didn't reply.  “Food?” Aaron said as he pulled up outside a cafe.

“Great,” Robert said. It was a greasy spoon all day breakfast kind of place on the outskirts on Hotten, but Aaron wasn’t complaining.

* * *

“So, how’d you get those scars?” Robert asked once the coffee and full English breakfasts had been delivered to their table.

“None of your business.”

“Come on, I want to know,” Robert said. “Don’t tell me you were in an unfortunate yachting accident.”

“Carry on and I’ll give you a black eye that you won’t be able to explain away.”

“Touchy,” Robert said, half smirking at him.

“You don’t know the first thing about them,” Aaron said. It still hurt, to have his weaknesses pointed out like this by Robert. Maybe he couldn’t fight their fate, maybe it was just going to be the way it always was.

“You don’t know the first thing about me," Robert said.

“Maybe I’m the only one who knows you at all,” Aaron said. “You try so hard to put a cover on with everyone else, but you don’t with me.”

“That’s what you think, is it?” Robert said.

“Yeah,” Aaron said quickly. “It’s what I know. You’re not faking it when you’re with me, Robert. I’m the only one you can talk to and…” Robert’s phone beeped. He looked at the text message.

“It’s Chrissie.”

“Perfect,” Aaron said sarcastically.

“Sorry. I have to go,” Robert said. 

“Great,” Aaron said. “Bye then.” Robert did look regretful, but he left anyway.

* * *

One thing that Aaron had been looking forward to that had nothing to do with Robert? Adam being released from prison. He was going to see his best mate again, and he couldn’t wait.

Aaron walked into the pub, grinning at Adam and Moira. “What, you don’t call?”

“Hey!” Adam said loudly, pulling Aaron into a bear hug. It was the first time that Aaron hadn’t been acutely aware of Robert in the same space as him, ignoring him at the bar. Though Aaron did catch a quick “who’s that?” from Robert to Vic. It felt so good to play darts with Adam, and Aaron knew they were in for a good night.

* * *

Robert was jealous. Aaron and this new Adam were getting on so well, and Aaron seemed so much lighter and happier than Robert had ever seen him. And he was jealous. Adam and Aaron spilled outside the pub, laughing and with a bottle of whisky and Robert, skulking, followed.

“New boyfriend?” Robert said, Adam grinning widely. Aaron looked at Robert levelly and Robert wondered if he was more sober than he looked.

“You wish,” Aaron said. 

“Nah, mate!” Adam said, clearly happy. “I’m FREEEE!”

“You’re drunk,” Aaron said easily. “Out of prison,” he added to Robert.

“Ah,” Robert said. “Dangerous criminal are you?”

“Do I look like it?” Adam said.

“You’re soft as hell,” Aaron said. “Leave it alone Robert. He’s a mate. He’s my best mate and I’ve not seen him in ages. All right?”

“Fine,” Robert said. Adam tripped over his own feet, landing in a mess and laughing at his own misfortune. Robert took the opportunity to grab Aaron’s arm and pull him close. “I don’t want you sleeping with anyone else.”

“Hypocrite,” Aaron said without heat. Robert couldn’t even bring himself to admit Aaron was right.


	8. Christmas 2014

“We can’t start a taxi firm, it doesn’t make enough money,” Aaron said casually.

“It would if we were running it!” Adam said enthusiastically.

“Forget it,” Aaron said easily. “Another pint?”

“Great,” Adam said as Aaron went to the bar, not to be nearer to Robert at all. Of course not.

“Why don’t you buy me a pint?” Robert said, voice smarmy. Aaron ignored him, and the bravado dropped, showing the more sincere Robert Aaron was more familiar with. “Let me buy you a pint.”

“No, ta,” Aaron said. “It’s covered.”

“Are you serious about starting a taxi firm?” Robert said. “You’ll need an investor.”

“No thanks,” Aaron said, out of habit more than anything else. “A taxi firm won’t work around here.”

“Not with that attitude,” Robert said.

“I’ve got an idea for something else,” Aaron said, thinking of the scrap yard. “I’ve just got to get Adam on side. Leave it, Robert,” he added as Robert went to speak. “I don’t need your money. Why is that your go to answer for everything? Why can’t you ever consider I’m worth more than that?”

* * *

The day of Andy and Katie’s wedding dawned and Aaron was distantly aware of the punch up at Jack’s grave between Robert and Andy the night before at the stag night. Wonderful. Aaron text Robert and drove up to Home Farm to meet Robert. In retrospect that was really dangerous, but at the time he hadn’t cared. He’d just needed to see Robert, a feeling he was experiencing again.

“How am I going to explain this?” Robert said, getting in the car. “Christmas day?”

“I’m sure you’ll think of something,” Aaron said. “Please, leave Vic alone.”

“Er… excuse me?”

“She’s at the pub crying over you and Andy,” Aaron said. “She doesn’t deserve it.”

“I’m sorry, what’s Vic said? This isn’t all my fault!”

“But you push people, Robert. You push people over the edge and you know it.”

“Oh, because Saint Andy never does anything wrong does he?” Robert said sarcastically.

“Robert, listen to me!” Aaron snapped. “I’m on your side, okay? But you and him can’t act like kids any more. Because too many people get caught in the cross fire. Just make nice. You don’t have to like Andy, but for Vic. Surely she matters.”

“You know she does,” Robert said. “About the investment…”

“I’m not taking it,” Aaron said briefly. “I don’t want your money, when will you get that through your thick head?”

“It’s not about the money!” Robert snapped. “I need a reason to meet you. I can’t keep pulling lies out of thin air, I need…” Robert sighed. “Unless you’re ending this. Us?”

“No,” Aaron said quickly. “Of course I’m not. But… you need to realise Robert… I’m not for sale.”

“I got that,” Robert said. “Merry Christmas.” Robert left Aaron’s car and he drove back to the village.

* * *

There was no way Aaron could reasonably avoid the wedding, and to be quite honest, seeing Robert with a slightly bruised cheek and in his maroon suit… well, he’d put up with Chrissie being present for that.

“You may kiss the bride,” Ashley said, a cheer going up from the crowd. Aaron felt that lurching feeling, like he’d missed a step. The engravings. Robert being a tantruming teenager by damaging the rings. It hadn’t happened. Had Aaron’s throw away comment been that important to Robert? Had that really changed things? Had Robert trusted him and fallen for him far before Aaron thought? Maybe the later romantic words of “I fell for you the moment I met you” weren’t as far from the truth as Aaron might have guessed. But the big news that was leaving Aaron almost shaking? _Things could be changed_. It was possible for him to change some things.

“I have to go home,” Chrissie said. “I can’t leave dad and Lucky alone on Christmas day. You stay with your family.”

“What, like the ghost at the banquet?” Robert said. “No thanks.”

“It’ll be worse if you’re not there,” Chrissie said. Robert kissed her cheek as she got into the car and left.

“You’re full of surprises,” Aaron said, when they were alone on the street.

“How’s that?”

“You didn’t make a scene at the wedding,” Aaron settled on. “I thought you would.”

“I considered it briefly,” Robert said. “But I listened to you.”

“Miracles do happen then, eh?” Aaron said. Robert kept watching him, almost swaying as he smiled at Aaron.

“So… are you going home?”

Robert smirked. “No.”

“Are you coming in?”

“What do you think?” Aaron grinned. It was all Aaron could do not to take Robert by the hand and drag him up the stairs, still having to maintain the secrecy of an affair after all.

* * *

Aaron came to with Robert’s fingers gently running through his hair. “That’s nice…” Aaron murmured. Robert kissed the map of scars on his abdomen softly, much more affectionate than previously. “Enjoying yourself?”

“Mm,” Robert agreed. “Want to talk about them?”

“No,” Aaron said. “But don’t stop.” Robert carried on for about ten minutes until he rested his head on Aaron’s stomach, eyes closing. “You can’t sleep here.”

“I know,” Robert said. “But I want to.”

“I want you to too,” Aaron said, stroking his hair.

* * *

“Right, I’ve been on the phone to Robert. It looks like he’s changing his mind about the investment,” Adam said, sitting next to Aaron in the backroom the next day.

“I don’t know, I think I might have got him wrong,” Aaron said. “Let me talk to him.”

“Master of persuasion, Aaron Livesy eh?” Adam said.

“Something like that,” Aaron said. “Seriously, don’t worry. I’ll talk him round.”

* * *

“Typical Sugden,” Aaron said when Robert eventually turned up. “You’re used to meeting your one night stands in hay barns?”

“You’re a bit more than a one night stand,” Robert said and Aaron almost glowed though he tried not to show it.

“I’ve been talking to Adam,” Aaron said. “We want your money. But, we’re in charge. You’re not the boss, it’s our operation, okay?”

“Fine,” Robert said. “I don’t care about the money, I just want a reason to meet you without having to lie.”

“What lie did you tell her today?”

“I didn’t,” Robert said.

“Risky,” Aaron said.

“Aaron, shut up,” Robert said, closing the gap between them and kissing him deeply, hands around Aaron’s waist and pulling him close. Aaron moaned, Robert felt so good against him, he’d almost forgotten how right it felt when Robert took his clothes off, desperately in need of touching him more. Aaron was too far gone for Robert, if possible, even more addicted to Robert than last time. 


	9. Hotel One

Robert was about to leave the cafe when Aaron came in, heading to the counter and he suddenly changed his mind, ordering another coffee as Chrissie left. Robert couldn’t see Aaron’s face from where he’d sat behind him, but it was enough that he could definitely feel Aaron’s presence.

“So, do I not get an invite to this posh do up at Home Farm everyone's talking about?” Aaron asked.

“Er, not unless you want to hand out the canapes.” Aaron huffed a laugh. “I’ll meet up with you later though. If you’re up for it?”

“What do you think?” Aaron asked and Robert smiled as he left, feeling like maybe this new years wouldn’t be a total disaster after all. He wanted to see Aaron, he craved him more than he’d probably admit to himself.

* * *

Aaron sat by the phone, waiting for Robert to cancel. He knew Chrissie wouldn’t let him out of her sight during the business soiree tonight, but it still hurt for Aaron to know Robert was putting her first. _You’ve got time_ , he reminded himself. _You get Robert in the end. For life, too, if I can stop wayward shovels getting in the way._

“Sorry. Have to reschedule. I can’t get out of it tonight.” Aaron’s heart sunk at the text, but he’d spend new years with Adam anyway. He’d missed time with Adam, but even so it was a poor second place.

Aaron knew the rejection was coming. It still hurt.

* * *

Aaron kept biting his nails, a habit he couldn’t get out of. He hadn’t created a fuss when Robert cancelled their rendezvous for new years day, even though he badly wanted to. But he hadn’t, because… Belle. Aaron very much liked Belle, and having her feel responsible for Lachlan’s overdose… well, if he could avoid that he would, and it’s not like he didn’t get his fill of Robert later on. In those early days, it had felt like now or never, but Aaron knew they had time. It still didn’t stop him chewing his nails to the quick.

One thing Aaron hadn’t counted on was that after Lachlan had OD’d, Robert wanted to meet up again, probably for some comfort even if that’s not what he said. Aaron couldn’t have got to the barn quicker if he tried.

They had a quickie before Aaron rolled onto his side. “Do you want to talk about yesterday?” Aaron said.

“What about it?” Robert said, eyes closed.

“Lachlan… overdosing on… whatever crap he’s taking?”

“Mm, well I didn’t think you’d want to talk about Chrissie,” Robert said, sighing. “She’s not happy with me, because apparently I should have been spying on him constantly through a peep hole. How’m I supposed to know he’s taking drugs?”

“At least… you called him an ambulance straight away, right? And he’s okay?”

“He’s more embarrassed,” Robert said. “Yeah, he’s fine. Can we not talk about them?”

“Fine,” Aaron said. “There is something I want to talk about with you.” He made a grab under the blanket, literally having Robert in the palm of his hand. “Don’t ever cancel on me two days running again. Otherwise you won’t get this again.” He squeezed slightly, in warning.

“Nah, you’d miss it,” Robert said smugly. Aaron hated that he was right. “Now that you’ve started, lighten up a touch and keep going.”

“You want round two?”

“If you’ve got another round in you,” Robert teased. Aaron rolled his eyes, then rolled on top of Robert. He was going to enjoy this.

* * *

Then, of course Katie started snooping, because she could, and Robert freaked out, trying to stop him and Aaron from meeting up. Aaron knew it wouldn’t last, but the idea of losing the limited time he had with Robert, even temporarily led Aaron up to Home Farm and the office. “It’s business,” Aaron said quickly. “Sam let me in.”

“Fine,” Robert said. “Get on with it.”

“We’re not running a taxi firm,” Aaron said. Robert looked at him blankly. “We can’t get the licence because I’m on a suspended and Adam’s been in prison, so it’s a no go before we start.”

“Great,” Robert said. “Is that it?”

“It’s your money,” Aaron said. “We were thinking a scrapyard. It’s hard graft, but it makes money.”

“You actually sound like you know what you’re talking about,” Robert said. Aaron huffed.

“Are you still good for the money with a changed plan or not?”

“Yes,” Robert said. “We’re not off for good, just for now while things cool down.”

“Robert, please… no one’s ever going to guess…”

“Are you that incapable of being patient?” Robert asked and Aaron tried to fight back the shiver. He wanted Robert so much but he just couldn’t have him.

* * *

A couple of weeks passed, agonisingly slow weeks where Adam and Aaron set up the yard, and Robert played up to the Alicia affair gossip.

“Want to go somewhere?” Aaron smiled at the text. Fucking finally.

“Yeah, what’re you thinking?”

“Hotel?” Robert said. “I want you all night.”

“Perfect. Text me the address.”

* * *

“What do you think you’re doing?” Aaron said, Robert looking like he was going to sleep.

Robert had a smile, slowly forming on his face. “Tired. Aren’t you?”

“No,” Aaron said. “Not yet. I’m not done with this yet.”

“Sometimes I think you’re better at this than I am,” Robert said, although he rolled over in bed willingly enough and pressed Aaron against the mattress. “God, you feel good.” Aaron smiled.

“An affairs meant to feel good, isn’t it?” Aaron said, as Robert kissed against his neck gently.

“Not this good,” Robert said.

“That’s why you keep coming back for more?” Aaron asked, fingers tangling in Robert’s hair which really needed a trim.

“Why do  _ you  _ keep coming back for more?” Robert countered. “You’ve got nothing to gain, you could have someone… uncomplicated.”

“I don’t want uncomplicated.”

“Then why…?” Robert asked.

“You know,” Aaron said.

“Yeah,” Robert said quietly. “I know.”

* * *

Aaron woke up first. Robert was snoring gently, on his back and he looked somehow younger. Aaron grinned to himself. He wanted Robert to think of him every time he was with Chrissie. He shimmied down the bed, hands on Robert’s hips as he straddled his legs. He stroked Robert to a semi and Robert arched a little, still more than half asleep. Aaron dipped his head and started blowing him. He really wanted Robert to remember this.

“...oh…” Robert moaned, breathing coming heavier. Aaron drew back for just a second.

“Awake yet?”

“I’m startin to be…” Robert said, his fingers twisting in Aaron’s hair and pulling him back. “Don’t stop. I need your mouth.”

“Mm,” Aaron said, getting busy, making sure Robert was wet, sucking him. Robert’s panting was like music to Aaron’s ears as he gently squeezed his balls the way he knew Robert liked.

“Fuck… I need you. I need to come…” Aaron pulled back with an obscene pop, making sure Robert was looking down at him as he licked his lips. “Why did you stop?” Robert whined, his voice strained.

“I want you to remember,” Aaron said. “When you’re with her, I need you to remember how desperate you get for me. How much you’re begging for me to blow you right now. How good this feels.”

“Please… don’t leave me like this…” Robert said.

“I make good on my promises,” Aaron said, licking his thumb and pushing it inside Robert’s hole, making him grunt, before going down on him again. It didn’t take long to push him over that edge, Robert crying out loudly as he came down Aaron’s throat.

“Mornin…” Robert said once he could talk again, voice slurred.

“I wanted to be memorable,” Aaron said, laying next to him and relaxing.

“Oh yeah, it was that,” Robert said. “What can I do for you? I need to make it up to you.”

“Rim me,” Aaron said. He’d spoken offhand, not really expecting Robert to take him up on the offer. First time around it had been at least weeks, if not months before Robert could get over his hang ups to be that intimate with him. But apparently a heavenly blow job could change his mind.

“Roll on your front, then,” Robert said. Aaron moved quickly, spreading his thighs and gasping at the first swipe of Robert’s tongue. Fuck yes…

* * *

“Go. I know you have to,” Aaron said, halfway into sleep. “I’m just gonna lose consciousness for a bit.” Robert laughed, easy, carefree as he kissed Aaron gently. 

“That was amazing,” Robert said. “I’ll text you later.”

“Mm,” Aaron said, and he was asleep before Robert left the room. He didn’t know that Robert spent a good couple of minutes watching Aaron sleep, looking at the way his chest moved when he breathed, the way the sheet wasn’t really covering him properly.

“God, I’m in deep,” Robert told himself. “Too deep,” he murmured, leaving the hotel room.


	10. Hotel Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little bit smutty again in this one, heading to Robert and Chrissie's wedding! Enjoy!

The scrapyard was set up and started going without any major hitches, much to Aaron’s relief. He was mentally far too busy dealing with Robert, trying to be alert to any changes, trying not to push things, trying desperately to remember exactly how things happened originally, dealing with Katie, that he barely had any attention to spare for the yard. That said, he was pleased it’d been set up well and correctly. At least it was one less thing to think about, and to be honest, Aaron was bored of working at the garage.

Even though him and Robert were meeting up often, it never seemed enough for Aaron. He’d got used to and familiar with married, always at home Robert, and this was… new. Aaron didn’t like the feeling. He also didn’t want to push too much, because there was a nagging feeling that was starting to grow bigger that… was he manipulating Robert? Using him? Robert didn’t know their history, he didn’t know that they got their happily ever after. Well, mostly. But because Robert didn’t know that, was Aaron… taking advantage?

Logic told him no, of course not. Because there was the deep attraction between them both that had always been there, and probably always would be there too. They’d have both acted on it, however and wherever they’d met. Aaron knew that, it had always been obvious. In fact, how everyone else in the village didn’t notice it for months on end was beyond him. 

_You’re not telling him anything_ , Aaron reminded himself. _You’re not changing anything or doing anything or using him. Robert had his own free will. If he wanted to stop their affair, or never even start it, he had that choice._ But still, it bothered him.

“Cain’s fine, right?” Aaron looked up to see Robert having poked his head through the back room.

“Yeah, he’s fine,” Aaron said dully.

“Diane here?”

“No, you’ll have to make do with me,” Aaron said.

“I’ve had worse company,” Robert said.

“I’m sure you have.” Aaron rubbed his hand across his face.

“Do you want to tell me what’s wrong?” Robert asked.

“What’re we doing Robert?” Aaron said. “Me and you. What’re we playing at?”

“Second thoughts?” Robert asked. “You can stop seeing me if that’s what you want. Is it?” he added in Aaron’s pause.

“You know it’s not,” Aaron said. “I don’t know. I just think…”

“Well, don’t,” Robert said. Aaron snorted.

“You prefer me not thinking?” Aaron quipped, half smiling at him.

“I think we both know how I prefer you,” Robert said, a dirty grin on his face. 

“When are you free?” Aaron asked.

“Tomorrow afternoon. The barn?”

“Great,” Aaron said.

* * *

“Do you believe in fortune telling?” They were in the afterglow otherwise Aaron wouldn’t have asked, and even then it just slipped out. “Like… telling the future and stuff.”

“Er… not really,” Robert said, turning on his side to look at Aaron. “You’d be the last person I’d have thought that believed in that kind of stuff.”

“Yeah,” Aaron said, shrugging. “It’s just… what if you knew something bad was going to happen. Would you change it?”

“Aaron, what’s up?” Robert asked, waking up fully now.

“Nothing,” Aaron said. “I’m being stupid. Forget it. You said Thursday? We can meet up again?”

“I’ll do my best,” Robert said, kissing Aaron lingeringly before getting up and putting his clothes on. “Next week. I’ve got a conference I’ve got to make an appearance at. It’s an overnighter and I’ve found a nice hotel.”

“Is that an invite?” Aaron asked. Robert smiled. “Yeah, I’ll be there. Friendly bit of advice, don’t take your car. It’s too familiar.”

“Are you having lots of other affairs then?” Robert asked. He was joking, but then his voice got serious. “Is there anyone else?”

“What, because you spend most of your time with her?” Aaron said darkly. Robert’s jaw clenched. “No, there’s no one else. You’ve got no right to get angry with me if there was, though. Going off with her all the time.”

“Are we arguing?” Robert asked. “It sounds like we’re arguing.”

“Just… leave it Robert. We always argue when we talk.” That was experience showing, but Robert didn’t question it, he just left the barn in an awkward silence.

* * *

Aaron didn’t borrow a tie off of Paddy this time. He couldn’t cope with the questions so he went out and bought one himself, knowing Robert wanted them to dress up for this hotel. Not that Aaron minded, he really enjoyed Robert in a suit. Particularly taking it off of him. He bumped into Andy in the bar before leaving for the hotel. He asked where Katie was, hoping it sounded casual. Apparently the weather was clear and she was out for a horse ride, which wasn't the best option, but it beat sneaking around hotel rooms and being a nosey cow.

Aaron checked into the room and he was nervous. Not of Robert, he knew Robert would show, but of all the other unknowns. Katie, Chrissie, Robert’s wedding. God, that was a horrible thought, one he’d been pushing aside for a while now.

Then Robert walked in and Aaron stopped thinking logically. Well, after he made triply sure the door was locked. “Expecting company?” Robert asked.

“I’m making sure we’re alone,” Aaron said. “I don’t get you for long.”

“Aw, needy?” Robert said, only half joking.

“What if I am?” Aaron said. “Are you seriously going to wait until after the football match is over?” he asked, nodding at the telly.

“No,” Robert said. “I’m not.” Robert kissed into Aaron’s neck. “God, it’s been a long week. I’ve missed you.”

“Yeah,” Aaron said. “So’ve I.”

* * *

They took their fill of each other quickly, frantically, desperately. Then they dozed on and off, Aaron waking up to the smell of chips, seeing Robert pour a couple of glasses of wine. “I ordered room service.”

“So I see,” Aaron said. “Did you lock the door?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Robert said dismissively. He handed Aaron a drink before laying next to him. “Have you got any energy left?”

“Why?” Aaron asked, a slow smile on his face. Robert pushed the bedsheets down, then straddled Aaron’s hips, looking down at him as Aaron stroked his thighs.

“I want you inside me,” Robert said, hand going to Aaron’s dick, getting him hard.

“We don’t do that,” Aaron said quietly.

“No, but you want to,” Robert said. “I want to. Unless you’re not up for it.” Robert’s touch was certainly beginning to wake him up again and Aaron wasn’t going to turn Robert down. But he was going to let Robert be in control, knowing he needed it. Or that was the plan, but after Robert pushed himself down onto Aaron, he wasn’t moving, just adjusting to the feeling.

Aaron gripped Robert’s hips hard. Robert was tight around him but felt so exquisitely good and eventually Aaron moaned. “Please… move…” Robert rocked his hips a little, but it wasn’t enough. “Do you trust me?” Robert nodded and Aaron flipped them over, Robert grunting at the change in position, Aaron now on top of him, Robert’s thighs tight around his waist. Aaron changed the angle and thrust, dragging against Robert’s prostate. He moaned loudly. “Fuck…”

“Good?” Robert made an unintelligible noise and Aaron grinned, doing it again. It was sweaty and sticky and messy, and Aaron stopped thinking, just doing what felt so good. God, he’d missed this, he’d missed this so much. Having Robert this intimately, it felt incredible, he was almost light headed with it.

“I’m close,” Aaron breathed. Soon, it was too soon, too quick. Robert nodded, his hands gripping Aaron’s arse, pulling him as close as he could get. Aaron stroked him off and both of them came within seconds of each other, Robert panting underneath him. Aaron kissed him gently. “You good?”

“Fantastic,” Robert said and Aaron almost smirked.

* * *

Aaron woke up to the shower running, and he looked at his phone. Seven in the morning. Katie hadn’t interrupted them, thank God. They actually got their time together and it’d been worth it. More than.

* * *

Robert felt good. He was lost in thought as he drove back to the village, thinking about Aaron. They’d needed that time together and he’d really enjoyed it. With Aaron, he didn’t have to put on a front, or wear a mask. He could just be himself, and after having to pretend and fake it with the White’s all week, he needed that. Much more than he’d ever be able to say. Last night had been incredible. He’d not told Aaron he’d never bottomed before, but he pretty much knew that Aaron would have worked it out. He wasn’t stupid, and it’d felt great.

Parking outside Home Farm, he sat in the car, thinking to himself. He’d always told himself he’d stop seeing Aaron when he got married. Because he wasn’t going to be the type of man to ruin a marriage by cheating. But the wedding was getting closer and he didn’t want to give Aaron up. He was enjoying it far too much and he was falling for him. Robert knew that but that left him stuck… because he couldn’t back out of marrying Chrissie. That was a done deal.

Putting it off, Robert went into the office, finding Chrissie already at work. “How was the conference?”

“A lot of drinking,” Robert said, kissing the top of her head. “How are you?”

“Fine,” she said, but there was something about her tone that didn’t sit right.

“That doesn’t sound fine,” Robert said. “What’s wrong?”

“I went to the pub last night,” she said.

“Let me guess, Katie’s got in your head?” she didn’t deny it.

“She just said… what kind of man goes away to a hotel the week before his wedding?”

“The kind who’s working,” Robert said. “You don’t trust me, do you?”

A pause. A hesitation that spoke volumes. “I do, it’s just she’s…”

“Yeah, I know what she’s like,” Robert said darkly. “Why do you let her bother you?”

“Why is she so interested in who you’re sleeping with?” Chrissie said. “Even if you were cheating, why does it affect her so much?”

“She’s probably bored with Andy already,” Robert said. “I’d be bored out of my mind if I had to share a house with him.” Chrissie smiled. “That’s better,” he said. “She’s crazy.”

“You wouldn’t like it if we moved somewhere with all my exes,” Chrissie said.

“I was a teenager,” Robert said. “And I trust you, so it wouldn’t matter.”

“I’m glad you’re home,” Chrissie said, giving him a kiss. “Can you deal with the Foresters, they like you more than me.”

“Yeah, where’s the file?” Robert asked, Chrissie handing it to him.


	11. Robert's Wedding Day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the comments, kudos and encouragement! It means so much to me! We finally got to Katie/Robert's wedding! Enjoy!

“Yeah, I’ll talk to you,” Aaron said to Paddy in the back room of the Woolpack. “But don’t go blabbing to mum, and don’t give me the lecture.”“Okay,” Paddy said, sitting on the sofa while Aaron almost but not quite paced in the kitchen. “So… is it trouble with the police, or boy trouble?”

“Er, I think I’m too old for “boy trouble,”” Aaron said, annoyed.

“Well, man trouble doesn’t sound right,” Paddy said. “Do we need a lawyer?”

“No!” Aaron snapped. “I’m not in trouble with the police, I’m not breaking my suspended sentence or anything. So relax.”

“Okay,” Paddy said. “Who is it you’ve met?” Aaron sighed. “I know you, you’re bound to have picked someone… complicated.” Aaron snorted, because yeah, that was one way of putting it.

“Right, I have met someone,” Aaron said.

“What’s the problem?”

“Don’t give me a hard time,” Aaron said. “He’s married.”

“Aaron!”

“Yeah, I know,” Aaron said.

“Did you know?” Paddy asked. “Before... things happened, did you know he was married?”

“Well....”

“Right.”

“I know it’s going to sound ridiculous, but… he’s the one.” Aaron was right, it actually sounded far more ridiculous when he said it out loud than it did in his head. And it hadn’t sounded great in his head to begin with.

“Aaron…” Paddy said. “Affairs don’t end well.”

“Maybe I’m the one that does,” Aaron said, though he didn’t sound convinced.

“Okay,” Paddy said. “Why do you keep going back to him? Is it…”

“I really care about him, all right?” Aaron said. “I know he’s with someone who doesn’t make him happy.”

“Aaron, do you love him?”

“Paddy, just… don’t. Leave it alone.”

* * *

The wedding was approaching fast, and the only moments Aaron got with Robert were snatched at best. Robert was feeling the pressure though, Aaron knew it. The desperate need with which he arranged to meet was evidence enough.

Aaron was there when Robert and the White’s left the pub, th night before the wedding, the unbelievable jealousy curling through him. It didn’t really help that Aaron knew how it all ended. Aaron found himself outside the pub, watching Robert say goodbye to Chrissie. She was spending the night before the wedding at Home Farm, while Robert was staying at the pub, Diane doing her “family” bit. He caught Robert’s eye as he returned to the pub, walking past him and not saying anything as Katie was leaving the pub at the same time. Their hands did touch though, and Aaron wondered if it was by accident. Probably not.

“Why do you hate him so much?” Aaron asked Katie.

“Experience,” she said sniffily.

“Why do you care?” Aaron said. “So what if Robert’s screwing a hundred other women, why does it affect you?”

Katie sighed. “It doesn’t. I’m… wait, you said “other” women?” Aaron tried to shrug it off, meanwhile panicking. Clearly it showed. “You know who he’s sleeping with, don’t you?”

“No,” Aaron said.

“Aaron!”

“Trust me,” Aaron said. “You’ll be better off if you leave it alone.” He walked away from her, wondering if he’d well and truly fucked up.

* * *

Aaron didn’t sleep. Robert didn’t sleep well either.

* * *

“Robert, stop calling me,” Aaron said. “I’m not meeting you today, I’m not easing your conscience while you marry the wrong person.”

“Please,” Robert said on the phone. “I need to see you.” Aaron hesitated.

“It’s a bad idea,” he said. “You’ll be late.”

“Please.”

“Fine,” Aaron said. He hated that he’d caved, but he also knew that he’d do anything Robert asked of him. He always had. 

* * *

He parked outside Wylies, seeing Robert’s car already there. Aaron’s heart was racing far more than it had last time he was here and for so many reasons. He walked in, seeing Robert in his wedding suit and his breath caught. He looked good. He’s marrying the wrong person. Katie. Death. Chrissie. Aaron couldn’t turn his mind off.

“Hey,” Robert said. “I’m glad you came.”

“Don’t go upstairs,” Aaron said. “I don’t think the floor’s going to hold.”

“That’s what you open with?” Robert said. “I didn’t know you were an architect.”

“The thing’s creaking already,” Aaron said. “You wanted to meet, I’m here. Nice suit,” he added quietly.

“I have to marry her today,” Robert said. “I’ve worked too hard to throw it all away. The position, the house, the business. I can’t.”

“I know that,” Aaron said. “That’s not why I’m here.”

“I still want to see you,” Robert said. “After. I can’t not.”

“You can’t have both,” Aaron said. “In your list of reasons why you’re getting married today, none of them were “I love her.””

Robert sighed and ran his hand over his face. “Why are you making such a big deal out of this? You knew all of this before you went anywhere near me.”

“Doesn’t mean I like it now,” Aaron said. “Look, it doesn’t matter. You do what you have to. You will anyway.”

“Don’t be like that,” Robert said. “Why’re you being this… this... cold?”

“You know why,” Aaron said. “I’ve fallen for you. I wish it didn’t have to be like this, but it is. I’m in love with you, and knowing you so well, it kills me that you're marrying the wrong person.”

“You’re not in love with me,” Robert said, face pale.

“You don’t know how I feel,” Aaron said. “I wish you’d stop fighting it.”

“You can either accept this for what it is, or we stop seeing each other,” Robert said.

“You know I can’t do that,” Aaron said. Aaron didn’t know exactly how it happened, but he found himself in Robert’s arms, his hands on Robert’s waist, foreheads almost touching. He gravitated towards Robert the way he always had. Needing his presence, being reassured by him being so close.

“Can you cope with this?” Robert asked, speaking lowly. Aaron nodded, Robert kissing him deeply, making Aaron dizzy with it. How much he wanted Robert right now was insane.

“Whoops. Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt,” Katie said, clearly taking a picture of them on her phone with a nasty smile on her face. “I’ll er… leave you to it.”

“Why’re you even here?” Aaron asked, trying not to panic as Robert's hands clenched. Oh God, no.

“I followed Robert’s car,” she said. “I thought to myself “where would Robert be going on his wedding day?” I should have known he’d been meeting his lover.”

“Katie, I’m warning you, don’t…” Robert started.

“Or what?” Katie said.

“Robert, just go,” Aaron said. “You’ve got somewhere to be, and I’m not changing your mind. Go.”

“I can’t just leave…” Robert said. “You need to delete the photo,” he added to Katie.

“Yeah, I don’t think so,” she said. “See, you don’t get to control me.”

“How much?” Robert asked. “How much do you want for it?”

“Robert!” Aaron snapped.

"Five grand?"

"Robert!!" Aaron repeated. “Go.”

“Oh, because you’re the master of persuasion, right?” Robert said.

“I’m telling you to go,” Aaron said. “Trust me.”

Robert sighed and left, much to Aaron's surprise. Both Katie and Aaron stood in silence as they heard Robert’s car engine disappear into the distance. “Katie, I’d love nothing more than for you to wreck Robert’s wedding. You think I want him to get married to her? Of course I don’t.”

“But you’re still going to talk me out of it?” she said. “Or at least try.”

“Do you think outing Robert’s going to solve everything with you and Andy? Do you think it’s going to make you happy?”

“Yeah,” she said. “I do.”

“Great, well you’re wrong,” he said.

“Look, I know you’re Chas’s son, but I can’t let Robert get away with this the way he does everything else,” she said. “And if Robert had no chance of making me delete the photo, you don’t have a chance either.” She tucked her phone in her pocket, and real true panic started to set in for Aaron. What if he changed everything? What if Katie stopped the wedding? He didn't **_want_ **Robert to marry Chrissie, but how much would that change the future if it was stopped?

Katie left the farm house, going outside to get on her horse. Aaron had nothing left to say as he watched her hurry away. Shit. But one thing Aaron hadn’t counted on was that Katie was in such a rush to leave, and presumably head to the church, that she both hadn’t bothered to put her helmet on, and she spooked her horse. The horse whinnied loudly and reared up with Katie on its back. Aaron knew what was going to happen and he watched in terrified slow motion as Katie arched off the horse, screaming as she fell onto the ground in an immobile heap. The silence was deafening. Aaron didn’t need to check her pulse to know she’d broken her neck. She was dead and he hadn’t been able to do a thing to stop it.


	12. Katie Aftermath

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the slow update!! I have a lot of stuff going on in my personal life which makes updating difficult. That said, enjoy!

Aaron was almost gasping for breath, trying not to panic. Katie’s lifeless body in front of him was not a good omen, and even though it was now obvious to him that he couldn’t have stopped it. The phone. Hand shaking slightly, he reached in Katie’s pocket and took her phone, going to delete the picture, but it was locked. He couldn’t delete it. Aaron couldn’t think of anything else to do, so he called Robert on his own phone.

“I can’t talk, I’m parking at the church,” Robert said briefly. And yet he still picked up the call, Aaron noticed.

“It’s Katie,” Aaron said, voice breaking slightly. “She’s… she’s dead.”

Robert stayed silent for a long long moment. “How?”

“She fell off her horse,” Aaron said. “I… Robert, I don’t know what to do.”

“Is it too late for an ambulance?” Aaron snorted.

“Yeah,” he said.

“Get out of there, Aaron,” Robert said. “I’ve got to go, but you need to leave.” Aaron knew he was right, but that didn’t make him feel any better as he got in his car and drove away, seeing Katie’s horse grazing in the distance, completely unconcerned with what had just happened.

* * *

Robert said his vows to Chrissie in a total blur. It was like his mind couldn’t comprehend anything else. Meeting Aaron, kissing Aaron, Aaron telling him he loved him, Katie, the photo, Katie… dead. He couldn’t think beyond that, and he knew he stuttered over his vows significantly, but Chrissie clearly took it for pre wedding jitters and nerves, which was fine with him.

* * *

Aaron still had Katie’s phone with him as he got changed into a suit. Aaron had no intention of going to the church, he knew Robert would marry Chrissie and it had hurt enough watching it once. But he needed to talk to Robert, so he was going to make an appearance at the reception. He had to.

It felt like time was slipping away from him as he walked into Home Farm. No one was on the door, so no one really bothered as to whether he’d been invited or not. Aaron went straight for the whisky, downing one to settle his nerves. He could see Robert with his fake smile and shook his head. Had he always been this bad at faking it? Robert locked eyes with Aaron and muttered something to Chrissie before making a beeline for him.

“What happened to the photo?” Robert asked lowly.

“Is THAT what you care about right now?” Aaron said, helping himself to another whisky. “Your brother’s wife is… and all you can think about is the photo?”

“Well, yeah,” Robert said bluntly. “The inks not even dry on my marriage certificate, so yes. Tell me you didn’t leave the phone on her.”

“What do you take me for?” Aaron said, showing Robert the phone. “I don’t know the PIN to delete it.”

“Give it here,” Robert said, quickly taking it out of Aaron’s hands and guessing numbers. It didn’t take him long to unlock it. “What do we do with the phone?” Robert asked once he’d deleted the photo.

“I have a plan,” Aaron said. “She visited mum this morning. I’m going to slip it down the sofa.”

“Oh right, and that’s going to work,” Robert said. “What if they track her phone when they investigate her death?”

“Why would they do that?” Aaron said, frowning. “She fell off her horse, it was an accident.”

“Was it?” Robert asked, looking Aaron directly in the eye. Aaron went cold.

“You think… you seriously think I’m capable of… that?”

“You did say “leave it to me” when I left,” Robert said.

“I should punch you round the face for that,” Aaron spat. “Why would you…” Aaron hissed the next few words “sleep with me if you thought I was capable of murder?!”

“No,” Robert said. “I don’t think that, of course I don’t. Convenient though.”

“Only for you,” Aaron said harshly. “I’d have loved Katie to blow through your pathetic marriage.”

“What, so then I could pick you?” Robert said. “This… us… it doesn’t have a happy ending, you know that. Take what I can give or nothing else.”

“Fine,” Aaron said, snatching the phone back. “I’ll deal with that. You get back to your perfect fake life.” And Aaron left.

* * *

He had thought about losing the phone down the back of the sofa, with no idea if it was a good plan or not. But it’d do.

* * *

Katie’s body was discovered, effectively ending the wedding. Andy was devastated, everyone was affected and Aaron could barely comprehend it. It felt like everything was happening so fast, and even having lived it once before, that didn’t really help. What made it even harder was the fact that he couldn’t see Robert very often, certainly not alone, and knowing that Robert suspected him. How could he suspect? How was that fair?

He overheard Chas and Paddy talking the next day. Or was it the day after? Chas was saying Katie’s death wasn’t an accident, and Robert had to be involved. Bloody hell, she always blamed him if she could. “It had nothing to do with Robert,” Aaron said as he came around the corner. “You can’t keep blaming him just because Katie didn’t like him.”

“No, something’s dodgy about this,” Chas said. “Robert was late to his own wedding. Katie was convinced he was having an affair. She must have known something.”

“She fell off her horse,” Paddy said.

“Without a helmet on? She never would have done that,” Chas said. “Maybe I should go to the police.”

“You can’t,” Aaron said.

“Why not?” Chas said. “The worst I can be is wrong.”

“You start throwing accusations around like that and you won’t be able to come back from it,” Aaron said.

“You know something,” Paddy said. Aaron didn’t have the energy to deny it.

“Nothing about Katie,” Aaron said. "But I know where Robert was.” He must have looked guilty and Paddy put it together.

“He’s the bloke you’ve been seeing.”

“... yeah,” Aaron said quietly. “You can’t say anything.”

“What?!” Chas snapped. “Why would you go anywhere near him?! He’s gay now?”

“No,” Aaron said. “He’s not gay. Just… you can’t say anything, I can’t wreck this.”

“He’s MARRIED, Aaron!” Chas snapped.

“Yes, I know that,” Aaron said. “Believe me, I like that far less than you do.”

“Did Katie know?” Chas asked. “That you were the other woman.”

“Sort of,” Aaron admitted. “You can’t tell anyone. You know that bloody family, if they found out about me and Robert do you think Lawrence would be “oh well, never mind!” Because I don’t!”

“Then why did you get involved with him?” Paddy asked. “You must have known he’d bring all kinds of trouble to your doorstep.”

“Well, I didn’t mention how good he looked in his jeans did I?” Aaron said sarcastically. Chas huffed. “You can’t tell anyone, okay? Just… don’t. It doesn’t affect Katie, it has nothing to do with her. Please mum, if you tell anyone… I can’t. Please, promise me.”

“How do you know he had nothing to do with Katie’s death?” Paddy asked.

“Do you really want me to paint you a picture of what we were doing before he went to marry Chrissie?” Aaron said bitterly. “Or have you got a good enough imagination?”

* * *

Aaron was alone at the yard when Robert came in, almost a week after the wedding. “The post mortem results are in.”

“You’re not going to tell me anything I don’t know,” Aaron said.

“She definitely broke her back off her horse,” Robert said.

“Which is what I told you a week ago,” Aaron said, shaking his head.

“I’m sorry,” Robert said.

“How could you think that of me?” Aaron said. “You think I just go around breaking the spine of someone who disagrees with me?”

“No,” Robert said. “But I’ve been around you when you lose your temper, Aaron,” he said. “I’m sorry. It was an accident.”

“Yeah,” Aaron said, biting his lip. “I know.” Aaron sighed. “Look, I need you Robert. I know you have Chrissie and all that, but I can’t… I can’t do this on my own.”

“I know,” Robert said. “I’m here. Okay?”

Aaron nodded and rested his head against Robert’s chest, feeling calm for the first time in days. He could feel the warmth of Robert’s body and it stopped him seeing Katie arcing off that horse in his minds eye. Robert’s hand came up and stroked Aaron’s back, and it was soft and strangely intimate. Aaron didn’t know how long they stood there until Robert’s phone buzzed.

“I have to go.”

“I know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know Chas didn't technically have to find out about the robron affair here, but that was a story point I wanted to keep as close to canon as possible. Thanks for being patient with me!


End file.
